Can I make a confession?

I didn’t love being pregnant. 

Not even a little bit.

In fact, most days it felt like slow torture, and I eagerly anticipated it being over.

Don’t get me wrong- I loved my baby. I loved feeling the little kicks and wiggles; I thought the hiccups were adorable; I treasured getting to see my baby during ultrasounds.

And- pregnancy freaking sucked. 

I always imagined I would love being pregnant. That I would glow that “pregnancy glow” and bask in the attention of strangers asking how far along I was. I imagined that “eating for two” would allow me to enjoy my favorite treats, guilt free, because the baby needed it (or at least that could be my excuse). 

In reality, I was a bloated, uncomfortable, hormonal mess. Everything pissed me off. My clothing stopped fitting at about 12 weeks, and I couldn’t squeeze my poor feet into any shoes other than slip-on sandals by 15 weeks. The constant heartburn and nausea kept me up at night, and I often found myself sleeping in a recliner just to find a little bit of relief. That pregnancy “glow” was all sweat.

I so desperately wanted to enjoy the pregnancy, and I felt guilty that I didn’t. I constantly worried that this might be a sign that I wasn’t going to be a good mom- afterall, if I didn’t love the journey of growing my child, how was I going to love them once they were born? 

I’m happy to share that my fears were not founded. 

As soon as I was no longer pregnant, I immediately began to feel better. I was overjoyed to meet my baby! 

Though there were many, many difficult moments in those newborn days (and, if I’m being brutally honest, parenting continues to be full of challenging days), not loving pregnancy didn’t impact my ability to love or care for my baby. 

If you don’t love being pregnant, know that we see you. You don’t have to love this part. And if you want to talk about it, we’d love to listen. 

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